all of you

i want you to know that hurting you
hurt me too
and having your tears dampen my tshirt
drowned my heart deep in regret

i want you to know that when it’s all said and done
your arms are the only ones i want to be wrapped so tightly in that i feel your heart beat against mine
your eyes are the only ones i want to gaze at forever in comfortable silence
your lips are the only ones i want to kiss in new places to commemorate adventures

i want you to know that
your hands are the only ones i want to have a secret handshake with while exchanging goofy grins
your smile is the only one i want to wake up to, and the only one that makes my heart flutter
your voice is the only one i want to hear on replay so i can soak in every word
and your soul is the only one i have admired so deeply and so truly

i want you to know
that i’m captivated by you
and i need you to know
that i love you always

——-love conquers all

worth it.

the heartbreak and pain
were not accidents
for they led me down a narrow trail
accompanied by old monsters
lonely and shattered,
i fought them off

there i was,
winding through the forest and crawling through the gravel
torn up

on an isolated and dangerous path
that led me right to you
and to myself

6/25

i fell in love with the way time stops when we are together, like love is an ocean and we are drowning in it, only able to hear the muffled sounds of life above the water.
i fell in love with how you promise to help me conquer the rainstorms in my head, because you don’t want me to fight these battles on my own.
i fell in love with the way your eyes gaze at me with sincerity, the way they light up when you talk about your future and how it now includes me.
i fell in love with your quirkiness and your dorkiness, the kind that brings out the child in me and makes me want to laugh with you forever.
i fell in love with the way you kiss me, soft yet passionate, but innocent and filled with fire.
i fell in love with the way we found each other, peeling back layers so gingerly until we were both raw and vulnerable, two transparent bodies with beautiful souls.
I fell in love with your resilience, because god knows you’ve moved mountains; now, you don’t have to move them alone.
i fell in love, and you caught me.
and i promise i’ll never leave your arms.

recovery

i use to swing along the line of life and death in my mind
teetering with reasons to stay and reasons to go

how could i ever think such thoughts when there are sunsets that make even the most pessimistic of people stop to gaze,
with hues of orange and pink and lilac
covering the horizon in swirls and gradients so beautiful that only the naked eye can capture its true essence

how could i ever think such thoughts when there are sunday mornings filled with pancakes and my father in a small café
hearing the clinking of coffee mugs and the strange yet familiar laughter of strangers

how could i ever think such thoughts when there are beaches with velvety sand and a symphony made up of gawking birds and the sound of the ocean kissing the shore,
filled with naps in the scorching sun and the reading of new novels that have been left in my bookcase for months

how could i ever think such thoughts when there are soft kisses and passionate kisses laced together with sweet smiles and the whisper of “i love you”, leaving even the most grounded of people up in the clouds

the sad thing is,
i know exactly how i could think such thoughts
because they once took up all of the vacancies in my mind
they are unwelcome visitors that still bang on my door from time to time

to the broken:
i hear you,
i see you
i will hold your hand until you see light again, just as people have done for me
and i will walk with you until the heaviness turns to feathers of hope

rebirth

When I’m with you, there are never enough hours in the day.
Every minute we are together passes like a bolt of lightning during a humid summer storm,
and every second is gone as fast as my heart after you ran away with it.

You’ve picked weeds from my brain and turned them into sunflowers, planting them with beautiful words and nurturing them with your gentle spirit.

No one can make tears of happiness fall from my eyes like you can, or make me want to leave my perfect little town to be a part of yours.

You’ve helped me find myself, and with each self-discovery, I find a little piece of you, too.
The gaping holes of despair and bitterness that use to cover my soul have been filled so lovingly by your caring heart.

Like a stunning mosaic glued together with pinky promises and childish giggles, I am whole again.
I will never stop being so captivated by what we’ve built together.
Our broken pieces bonded together so effortlessly, and I can’t wait to keep creating artwork
with you.